This is NOT a Fashion Post!

 These are my shoes now, all old and good for working on the farm

When I was living and working in London, I shopped like any girl who worked hard; I wore makeup and spent a lot of money on my hair. Although I splurged on some very expensive shoes and bags and clothes, I'd never run into debt or got myself into financial troubles. I bought those expensive stuff under the pretense of: Oh, I work hard and I need to treat myself. Oh yea, this £500 bag is just a treat for working so hard; this mega expensive dress is just to make me feel better, bla bla. But did I really feel better, good, confident, and happy in those expensive clothes! The answer is: NO. I felt miserable, I was depressed, I suffered from a very low self-esteem, despite the expensive stuff. I was a walking and living misery. Do you want to see some of the stuff I had? See below pic :)

 This is just a sample from what I used to have. Anyway, after I had made the change and left my job and flat in London and moved into a small house on a farm without hot running water or a fridge or a washing machine or a TV or internet or central heating, I learnt my lessons and realized what a pathetic and shallow life I was wallowing in. First thing I did was I got rid of all these expensive stuff, all of them And now I have only old and secondhand stuff.

 And this is the closest I got to wearing some of those expensive shoes and bags before I got rid of them, in my bedroom in front of the mirror. Sad, eh?  Some of those shoes and bags I never wore and just played dress-up with them in my bedroom. But one day: BOOM, I decided that is it. And got rid of them all. Now, I do not own any single expensive or new thing!

This is me now: without any makeup or fancy hair cut or expensive clothes or shoes. I wear secondhand clothes from my dear friend in London or some of my Italian friends here, who find it a bit strange! I do not use any creams or cosmetic products like shampoos or body wash or perfumes or anything. And despite that, I think I look great and healthy and the most important thing: Happy. I've never been happy in my life as I am now wearing old and not so pretty clothes. I'm beaming with confidence and grace and I feel great. I made a vow that I will never buy any thing that is not ethical; I will never step a foot inside a department store or a chain store or buy from any brand. I will never buy or wear any thing while there are One Billion persons in the world who can not have three normal meals like the rest of us. One Billion people! 

Not only I got rid of all the expensive shoes, bags and clothes but also any jewelry I had. Gold and diamonds to me are all blood gold and diamonds. I can never justify to myself wearing a gold or diamond ring while some people died in the process of mining for the gold or diamond! I do not need any gold or diamond to feel good and pretty. All I need is to wear my sincere smile :)

Why I'm telling you all of this? Well,  I just thought to share this with you because I'm sure there are some of you out there who are still struggling with body image and think that expensive clothes or more stuff or makeup will make them happy. Not at all. Happiness comes from simple things in life; happiness is when you think of others not just you. Happiness in not this vicious cycle of expectations but rather the awareness that the more we expect and need the more miserable we become. This has to stop and we have to start living in the moment with what you have. Do not pay attention to what others say (believe me lots of people think I'm crazy to leave my ex comfy life for this hardship but I do not care) and do what your heart and conscious tell you.